Feeling Stuck and Finding a Way Forward

Episode 24 · September 7, 2023

Change, feeling stuck and procrastination

The Truth Hurts · Episode 24 · audio in Hebrew

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The conversation

You know exactly what isn't working in your life, and you stay in the same place anyway, another day, another month, another year. The way Gili sees it, being stuck is the gap between where you are and where you want to get to, and even without knowing exactly what you want, that gap on its own is what creates the heavy feeling. In most cases there's a part of us that actually gains something from being stuck, along with a deep fear of change that makes us prefer blaming outside forces to moving ourselves. The simplest question, and for that reason the most embarrassing one: what would you do tomorrow morning if nothing at all were holding you back?

The truth

  • Being stuck is the gap between where you are now and where you want to get to. Even without knowing exactly what you want, that gap alone creates the feeling.

  • There's a difference between the energy of creation and the energy of stopping, and both avoidance and perfectionism ("if it isn't perfect I'm not doing it") are forms of stopping.

  • Nobody stops us except ourselves. Usually there's a part of the subconscious that gains something from our staying put.

  • Fear of change makes us prefer a familiar routine even when it's a bad one, and blame outside forces instead of moving.

  • Fear of change makes us prefer a routine we know even when it isn't good for us, and blame outside forces instead of taking responsibility.

  • Hard events can point straight at what we're missing and become the force that drives us to act, as long as we don't run from them.

Questions and answers

What is being stuck?

Being stuck is what a person feels when there's a gap between the situation they're actually in and the situation they're asking for, wanting, longing for. Even if the person doesn't know exactly what they want, the very existence of that gap already creates the feeling of being stuck, because when you feel satisfied and full, you don't feel stuck.

Why do I stay stuck even when I really want to change?

Usually there's a part of our inner machinery that feels it gains something from the way things are, and above all, a deep fear of change. It's easier to blame something outside and stay in the victim role than to move ourselves.

What keeps me from actually moving even though I know exactly what needs doing, and how do I break out of being stuck?

First you look at the situation as it is, without judging it and without hunting for anyone to blame. Then you define the situation you want, and then you use guided imagery: you imagine in depth what life will look like and feel like in that situation, because the brain can't tell the difference between imagination and reality.

What happens when you focus on the problems instead of on the situation you want?

When a person sits and thinks about their problems, they make the pain bigger and the problems stronger, because the energy flows to wherever the focus is. So it's better to focus on where you want to be than on what's missing.

Gili's original episode description

Let's talk about being stuck!

Has it ever happened to you that you got stuck in one place and felt you weren't moving forward?

Is the feeling of being stuck about what you lack, or about endless, confusing time?

In this episode Tal and Gili focus on being stuck: what it is, what causes it, and how you can deal with it in a way that leads to improvement and growth.

By changing your point of view you can arrive at revolutionary insights.

And of course, in Gili's tips corner you'll get practical tools to help you break out of being stuck and move forward in every area of life.

About the podcast

Listening to The Truth Hurts feels like sitting in on a healing session.

The truth can hurt. It’s right there in the name. But we’re not here to cause pain. Quite the opposite.

In each episode, two women sit down for an honest conversation: an Emotional Healer and her client.

We talk about healing and consciousness, faith and science, the body and soul, personal growth, energy, and different approaches to healing. Above all, we face the truth no one says out loud: everything around us is upside down.

Is this podcast for you?

  • You want to hear the truth, and you’re ready to face it. (Yes, those are two different things.)
  • You want to gain insight and improve your quality of life.
  • You want to make a change.
  • You want a deeper understanding of the laws of the universe.
  • You want to live a healthy life in body and soul.
  • You want to take away something you can carry with you for life.

You don’t need any prior knowledge. You only need the desire to explore a wide range of ideas and discover practical guidance for living.

Listen and get in touch

Gili Man Wolner, Emotional Healer. Helping you heal and grow through Jewish wisdom.

Have a question about an episode? Send a WhatsApp message to +972 50-681-0611 (messages only).

Listen to The Truth Hurts (in Hebrew).

Tal Eckerling, co-host: Website · Facebook · Instagram